《2 new+moon新月》第121章

〃No。　You　don"t。〃　
He　glowered　at　me　and　started　to　speak；　but　I　cut　him　off。　
〃If　you　really　believed　that　you"d　lost　your　soul；　then　when　I　found　you　in　Volterra；　you　would　have　
realized　immediately　what　was　happening；　instead　of　thinking　we　were　both　dead　together。　But　you　
didn"t—you　said　"Amazing。　Carlisle　was　right；"〃　I　reminded　him；　triumphant。　〃There"s　hope　in　you；　after　
all。〃　
For　once；　Edward　was　speechless。　
〃So　let"s　both　just　be　hopeful；　all　right？〃　I　suggested。　〃Not　that　it　matters。　If　you　stay；　I　don"t　need　
heaven。〃　
He　got　up　slowly；　and　came　to　put　his　hands　on　either　side　of　my　face　as　he　stared　into　my　eyes。　
〃Forever；〃　he　vowed；　still　a　little　staggered。　
〃That"s　all　I"m　asking　for；〃　I　said；　and　stretched　up　on　my　toes　so　that　I　could　press　my　lips　to　his。　
EPILOGUE　TREATY　
ALMOST　EVERYTHING　WAS　BACK　TO　NORMAL—THE　GOOD；　prezombie　normal—in　less　
time　than　I　would　have　believed　possible。　The　hospital　weled　Carlisle　back　with　eager　arms；　not　even　
bothering　to　conceal　their　delight　that　Esme　had　found　life　in　L。A。　so　little　to　her　liking。　Thanks　to　the　
Calculus　test　I"d　missed　while　abroad；　Alice　and　Edward　were　in　better　to　shape　to　graduate　than　I　was　
at　the　moment。　Suddenly；　college　was　a　priority　（college　was　still　plan　B；　on　the　off　chance　that　Edward"s　
offer　swayed　me　from　the　postgraduation　Carlisle　option）。　Many　deadlines　had　passed　me　by；　but　
Edward　had　a　new　stack　of　applications　for　me　to　fill　out　every　day。　He"d　already　done　the　Harvard　
route；　so　it　didn"t　bother　him　that；　thanks　to　my　procrastination；　we　might　both　end　up　at　Peninsula　
munity　College　next　year。　
Charlie　was　not　happy　with　me；　or　speaking　to　Edward。　But　at　least　Edward　was　allowed—during　my　
designated　visiting　hours—inside　the　house　again。　I　just　wasn"t　allowed　out　of　it。　
School　and　work　were　the　only　exceptions；　and　the　dreary；　dull　yellow　walls　of　my　classrooms　had　
bee　oddly　inviting　to　me　of　late。　That　had　a　lot　to　do　with　the　person　who　sat　in　the　desk　beside　me。　
Edward　had　resumed　his　schedule　from　the　beginning　of　the　year；　which　put　him　in　most　of　my　classes　
again。　My　behavior　had　been　such　last　fall；　after　the　Cullens"　supposed　move　to　L。A。；　that　the　seat　beside　
me　had　never　been　filled。　Even　Mike；　always　eager　to　take　any　advantage；　had　kept　a　safe　distance。　
With　Edward　back　in　place；　it　was　almost　as　if　the　last　eight　months　were　just　a　disturbing　nightmare。　
Almost；　but　not　quite。　There　was　the　house　arrest　situation；　for　one　thing。　And　for　another；　before　the　fall；　
I　hadn"t　been　best　friends　with　Jacob　Black。　So；　of　course；　I　hadn"t　missed　him　then。　
I　wasn"t　at　liberty　to　go　to　La　Push；　and　Jacob　wasn"t　ing　to　see　me。　He　wouldn"t　even　answer　my　
phone　calls。　
I　made　these　calls　mostly　at　night；　after　Edward　had　been　kicked　out—promptly　at　nine　by　a　grimly　
gleeful　Charlie—and　before　Edward　snuck　back　through　my　window　when　Charlie　was　asleep。　I　chose　
that　time　to　make　my　fruitless　calls　because　I"d　noticed　that　Edward　made　a　certain　face　every　time　I　
mentioned　Jacob"s　name。　Sort　of　disapproving　and　wary…　maybe　even　angry。　I　guessed　that　he　had　
some　reciprocal　prejudice　against　the　werewolves；　though　he　wasn"t　as　vocal　as　Jacob　had　been　about　
the　〃bloodsuckers。〃　
So；　I　didn"t　mention　Jacob　much。　
With　Edward　near　me；　it　was　hard　to　think　about　unhappy　things—even　my　former　besi　fnend；　who　was　
probably　very　unhappy　right　now；　due　to　me。　When　I　did　think　of　Jake；　I　always　felt　guilty　for　not　
thinking　of　him　more。　
The　fairy　tale　was　back　on。　Prince　returned；　bad　spell　broken。　I　wasn"t　sure　exactly　what　to　do　about　the　
leftover；　unresolved　character。　Where　was　his　happily　ever　after？　
Weeks　passed；　and　Jacob　still　wouldn"t　answer　my　calls。　It　started　to　bee　a　constant　worry。　Like　a　
dripping　faucet　in　the　back　of　my　head　that　I　couldn"t　shut　off　or　ignore。　Drip；　drip；　drip。　Jacob；　Jacob；　
Jacob。　
So；　though　I　didn"t　mention　Jacob　much；　sometimes　my　frustration　and　anxiety　boiled　over。　
〃It"s　just　plain　rude！〃　I　vented　one　Saturday　afternoon　when　Edward　picked　me　up　from　work。　Being　
angry　about　things　was　easier　than　feeling　guilty。　〃Downright　insulting！〃　
I"d　varied　my　pattern；　in　hopes　of　a　different　response。　I"d　called　Jake　from　work　this　time；　only　to　get　an　
unhelpfulBilly。Again。　
〃Billy　said　he　didn"t　want　to　talk　to　me；〃　I　fumed；　glaring　at　the　rain　oozing　down　the　passenger　window。　
〃That　he　was　there；　and　wouldn"t　walk　three　steps　to　get　to　the　phone！　Usually　Billy　just　says　he"s　out　or　
busy　or　sleeping　or　something。　I　mean；　it"s　not　like　I　didn"t　know　he　was　lying　to　me；　but　at　least　it　was　a　
polite　way　to　handle　it。　I　guess　Billy　hates　me　now；　too。　It"s　not　fair！〃　
〃It"s　not　you；　Bella；〃　Edward　said　quietly。　〃Nobody　hates　you。〃　
〃Feels　that　way；〃　I　muttered；　folding　my　arms　across　my　chest。　It　was　no　more　than　a　stubborn　gesture。　
There　was　no　hole　there　now—I　could　barely　remember　the　empty　feeling　anymore。　
〃Jacob　knows　we"re　back；　and　I"m　sure　that　he"s　ascertained　that　I"m　with　you；〃　Edward　said。　〃He　won"t　
e　anywhere　near　me。　The　enmity　is　rooted　too　deeply。〃　
〃That"s　stupid。　He　knows　you"re　not…　like　other　vampires。〃　
〃There"s　still　good　reason　to　keep　a　safe　distance。〃　
I　glared　blindly　out　the　windshield；　seeing　only　Jacob"s　face；　set　in　the　bitter　mask　I　hated。　
〃Bella；　we　are　what　we　are；〃　Edward　said　quietly。　〃I　can　control　myself；　but　I　doubt　he　can。　He"s　very　
young。　It　would　most　likely　turn　into　a　fight；　and　I　don"t　know　if　I　could　stop　it　before　I　k—〃　he　broke　off；　
and　then　quickly　continued。　〃Before　I　hurt　him。　You　would　be　unhappy。　I　don"t　want　that　to　happen。〃　
I　remembered　what　Jacob　had　said　in　the　kitchen；　hearing　the　words　with　perfect　recall　in　his　husky　
voice。　I"m　not　sure　that　I"m　eventempered　enough　to　handle　that…　You　probably　wouldn"t　like　it　
so　much　if　I　killed　your　friend。　But　he"d　been　able　to　handle　it；　that　time…　
〃Edward　Cullen；〃　I　whispered。　〃Were　you　about　to　say　"killed　him？　Were　you？〃　
He　looked　away　from　me；　staring　into　the　rain。　In　front　of　us；　the　red　light　I　hadn"t　noticed　turne